on (my) being a stay-at-home mom

i always thought of hubbies who let their wives stay at home as selfish and these wives as 'sayang'. i've been working since i graduated from college and quitting my job was for me, never an option. not until my own hub started asking me to be full-time with the kids. i never gave in, of course but when Daddy had a very tragic accident and died on October 20, 2009, I tendered my resignation effective that day. and that's how i started as a SAHM. you can say it was accidental but i'd like to believe it was all part of God's plan. my very first thought was mao diay gaan ra sa akong dughan ang pagstop ug work kay mawala na man diay si Daddy, wala nay mohatod kuha sa mga bata.

so it's been more than half a year that i've left the corporate world. i spent the first two months keeping Mama company in Surigao, me being the only one based in the Philippines. so far. it's been so good. i mean, i thought i'd terribly miss having a job. maybe it helped that i was too engrossed grieving over Daddy's death that i lost interest on anything. or maybe i was already too tired working, it felt good to just stay home. whatever it is, i'm glad i gave it a try.



from january to march, i was basically busy with driving Marti to and from school (and missing Daddy doing this) and guiding her with her school assignments every weekend and going to the gym and facebooking and twittering. end of march got me a little busier with a new-found small business, the Batangas-grown and made cream dory fillet and other products.

april and may, we were travelling. and starting first week of may, our househelp and yayas went home. that's when i was "put to a test". you may not believe me when i say, i've been loving every minute i spend with Marti an Zach. it's true what they say that you and the kids get closer. what i love most is being able to let Marti (the most difficult to feed) eat three meals a day and wear her much-needed eye patch (for her lazy eye) 4 hours a day. they may be nothing compared to SAHMs taking care of toddlers and babies at the same time cooking for the family or washing the clothes and cleaning the house. but those are, for me, an achievement. i admit, though, that i wish i could really be an "all-around" mom and housewife. right now, i only take care of the kids. Mama cooks for all of us while a labandera comes to do the laundry. today, i made an improvement. i washed the car (manually, kabu and balde) and did the dishes.

this is getting quite long and way sense. what i am trying to say is being a SAHM for me is not at all as awful as i thought it would be. it may be too early to say this and i may sound weird but so far, i haven't had any insecurity about not having a job. so far, wala pa ko nag self-pity but one time two weeks ago, nag emote ko. i told the hub i feel unappreciated here and i'm tired. yes, hayahay sya nga kapoy sad. going out with friends is definitely a sanity-saver. :)

here's hoping and praying i'd love this life more and more and the hub will be blessed with good health and a stable (and high-paying) job so he can afford to raise a SAHM and two preschoolers.

photo: me and my new "officemates" at a friend's wedding